I am a product of my decisions
We all must make some significant decisions during our lives. These decisions have a substantial impact on us but also affect the people close to us. The implications of these decisions can last for years or even decades. As a result, it is sometimes stressful to make big decisions and requires a lot of courage.
The years directly after school
Young adults must decide how to spend their precious years directly after school. This time is crucial to prepare themselves for the rest of their lives. This decision impacts the knowledge they acquire, the skills they develop and the people they meet.
Some young adults are clear on what they want to do and work according to a plan. They have clarity on the why, what, and how questions. However, others are unsure how they want to spend these critical years. Their initial plans sometimes do not work out or are very different from their parents` views. It can be a very stressful period for young adults and their parents. In my letter, leaving the nest, I share more about my experience as a parent.
Relationships
Everyone makes decisions about relationships. Other people’s impact on you is significant, and you must therefore decide who you allow into your inner circle and where your boundaries lie. It becomes challenging when you realise it is time to end a close relationship. It usually happens because the relationship is no longer constructive, and long-term goals and values are no longer aligned. These decisions cause great conflict, loss, and sadness.
Career
In a rapidly changing world, a few people’s types or places of work remain the same during their careers. Career decisions affect your financial planning and personal growth. It also affects the level of fulfilment and peace of mind you experience. Sometimes you do not have control over career decisions. Businesses close, retrenchments happen or hiring criteria change to promote diversity in inclusivity. In these situations, you only have control over your reactions and actions.
Relocation
Career decisions, relationships, or life stages usually drive relocation decisions. It requires a lot of change and adjustment. In my letter entitled, big, difficult decisions, I share more about the decision and impact of our move from South Africa to Switzerland.
Lessons learned from my own life decisions
We seldom have certainty about what the right decision is in each situation. We take a step in faith and give it our best. Many of my life decisions did not work out as I had planned. I ended up with a career very different from what I studied, and my first marriage ended in divorce. However, I am infinitely grateful for the life experience and personal growth that resulted from the decisions. They have contributed to a colourful journey.
I have also learned over the years that the lack of a life decision when it is needed can steal a lot of peace. Courage is also a decision.
Considerations during life-changing decisions
We often make life-changing decisions based on “gut feeling”. However, you must evaluate for yourselves how the decision:
• Influence your vision, life purpose and long-term goals;
• Affect different aspects of your life to avoid being so focused on one aspect and in the process fail to think about the impact on all other aspects; and
• Support your values. Personal values are the things that are important to us and have a significant impact on our happiness in life, sense of pride, and personal fulfilment.
No one can make life-changing decisions on your behalf. However, you are welcome to contact me if you need the help of an independent coach to help you arrive at your answer.
regards
Emsia