Family is not always blood. Family represent those people who choose to have you in their lives. They accept you just the way you are. These people will do anything to see you smile and stand by you through thick and thin. Sometimes they cross our paths in unexpected ways. They are gifts from Above.

Bettie taught me to cook traditional Cape food

As a young married woman with limited cooking skills and time, Bettie crossed my path as a domestic worker. Bettie took care of our household and cooked the most delicious meals. Easter weekends, Bettie spoiled us with a traditional Cape Easter speciality, pickled curried fish from Cape Malay cuisine. She and Abraham worked on a wine farm all their lives, and Abraham later became our gardener.

Our families got to know each other well and had a lot of mutual respect. We supported Bettie after Abraham’s death and during the drug addiction of a family member. She helped me through my divorce and sat at the main table at Charl and my wedding. When she died of cancer, my grief was the same as that of a family member. She was like a mother to me and an inspiration in many ways.

Au pairs that have enriched my children’s lives

With Zander’s birth, I could no longer keep all the balls in the air. I decided to enlist the help of an au pair. Inspirational young women crossed my path. Each of them was unique with unique interests and contributed to us in different ways. Their skills also complemented my skills and creativity where it was lacking, as with cake and party decorations. Many of them are now moms blessed with their children.

Their farewell letters confirmed the shared time with us was also meaningful to them. Within a week of our last au pair joining us, her long-standing love affair with her boyfriend, also with name Zander, ended. She utilised her passion for technology to play her hurt away with video games with little Zander. She was his computer gamer friend. She wrote in her farewell letter, “One Zander broke my heart, but another little Zander was sent across my path to heal it.”

Grandpa Frikkie, my husband’s ex-father-in-law

Grandpa Frikkie crossed my path through Charl. He is Charl’s father-in-law from his first marriage. Their bond was extraordinary, and both decided that their relationship would continue after Charl’s divorce. Grandpa Frikkie attended our wedding despite his own emotions.

His role in our lives has slowly but surely taken shape. With Zander’s birth, we agreed that he could be Zander’s Grandpa Frikkie. Grandpa Frikkie was at Zander’s christening and attended every birthday party. Once a month, he came to play with Zander on a Saturday morning so that Charl and I could have breakfast together. We were amazed at the projects they embarked on and the games they played.

It was hard to say farewell to Grandpa Frikkie when we moved to Switzerland. He keeps in touch with each of us and shares news from South Africa. He also calls Zander regularly to connect and better understand his world.

Even though Grandpa Frikkie is already 74, he is up-to-date with technology. They live in a retirement village, and he uses all his knowledge and skills to help others. He played a cardinal role in assisting the residents with online Covid vaccination registrations. He invited me to join an online bible study, which I experienced as positive and informative. I enjoy the wisdom and stories that he shares.

My father went to heaven shortly after my thirtieth birthday. Grandpa Frikkie is the closest to an earthly father I have. I am grateful for having someone who feels like a father, even though he is my husband’s ex-father-in-law.

Our angels here on earth

People who feel like family are those people who will support us, help us grow, encourage us and be there for us when we need it. God selected them carefully to be our angels here on earth.

Kind regards

Emsia