According to experts, change consists of three distinct phases. The first phase is the finishing, parting, and closing. It brings loss and relief. Second is the in-between phase, like the trapeze artist in the circus letting go on one side without certainty that the bar will be on the other end at the right time and place. The third phase is the new beginning. It usually brings an element of excitement but also uncertainty about my ability to handle the uncertain situation.

Each of these phases has its challenges and emotions that go along with it. The first phase is saying goodbye and letting go. Successful new beginnings are dependent on proper closure, and closure involves letting go.

My haven

I must let go of our house of twenty years. This house is my haven when the storms rage. With my first view of the lovely garden and dollhouse under the big shade trees, I knew this was where I wanted to raise my kids. Here my children took their first steps. We had numerous birthday parties, played for hours on the lawn or in the pool and curled up in front of the fireplace in winter.

My garden

In the garden are many monuments in the form of plant cuttings and seedlings received as gifts. It recognizes everyone who has contributed to the colourful picture, even though many are no longer with us.

Until recently, a door carried artwork created by a three-year-old on a door. Young Christo drew it with a permanent marker pen while we waited for his dad to come home so we could go on vacation. A piece of the blind in the teen room was still missing. The explanation for the disappearance, by a wise-nose teenager, was “the spontaneous disintegration of solid matter”. However, after years of wondering, I resolved the mystery. A cricket ball had gone off course while being played with illegally in the garage.

Memories in each room

In each room are memories of moments that are part of my life and past. I think with a smile how we played riding the horse in the living room with the little ones on my back. Later, they had sleepover parties with their friends, and we ate pizza, built puzzles, or played board games at the fireplace.

Saying farewell to the neighbours

We are lucky to have wonderful neighbours, with George as a friend for Zander as a bonus. We met Fritz and Aletta in the street and immediately knew we had something in common with our strollers containing baby boys. My dreams for the boys of having fun, playing, and sleepovers played out as envisioned. The tree next to the backyard wall provided convenient access to the neighbours. Initially, George’s fear of the big brothers, with the braces on their teeth, made him reluctant to visit! Fortunately, he outgrew the fear, and the two friends’ farewell broke our hearts.

The house is still on the market, and we are waiting for the right new owner. This space, which served as a haven for twenty years, is now ready to become someone else’s. As with everything here on earth, it was only temporarily lent to us, and now it is time for us to move on. It is now someone else’s turn to make the place a haven and build beautiful memories.

Kind regards

Emsia